Thursday, November 15, 2012

The zoo

First I went with my class to the zoo.It was on Monday and our group didn't have any name but Georgia,my aunty,Dylan,Luca v and me.Our goal was to see all the animals.And we enjoyed it.so much we want to go agin i like trips.ThenI went to the kid zone and I saw some sand and I thought that it was food for the animals in the kidzone therewere also some games up stairs we went to the vet clinic and I saw a collaborating poster in the vet clinic I saw an operation before I did that I went uder a tunnel were you can see mawcats and it was fun becauase I like mawcats.and a red panda it was cute.







                        








11 comments:

  1. Hi,Aaliyah i like how you done a lot of the detail

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    1. thank you cooper you are very nice and you have a nice comment

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  2. Hi Aaliyah I think you had a lot of detail and i like it and i enjoyed your story.

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    1. thank you Georgia i like your feed back and next time i will do a better job

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    2. i relly like your sentice about the zoo.

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  3. hi Aaliyah i love your story about the zoo and talking about differint animals to and who your going whith

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  4. Hi Aaliyah i relly relly liked your ritting.

    From Georgia

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  5. cool Lanessa.I really liked how you told us about how you liked the paticular animals like the meerkat and the red pandas.Next time you could edit a little more.

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  6. Hi Aaliyah,

    I like your writing about what we did at the zoo. I also liked how you have put lots of detail in your story about the animals and what we did and what happened there. Next time I think that you could improve on putting another sentence at the end instead of ending it with "and a red panda", Also you could improve on reading it after you have finished typing because when you said "Then I went to the kid zone" the word then and I was joined together.But you did a good job

    From Roquia

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  7. Hi Lanesa Next time can you tell us how it collaberate.

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  8. lovele work Blair its awesome and nice you put in lots of detail from freddie

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